Top Ten List

Top ten reader-submitted responses to the question, “Why is your Lamborghini black with gold sparkles down the middle?”

10. “It matches my shoes.” —PeacePipe21

9. “Three words: Liberace Estate Sale.” –Ken D.

8. “The gold for the side panels was back-ordered.” —Aaron H.

7. “My Bedazzler was broken.” —Sue L.

6. “Winning? Duh.”  —Stephanie S./BigTopGun

5. “What are you talking about? My Lamborghini isn’t gold spark– What the fuck?! Chanterelle!” –MorkOfOrk

4. “It’s for my daughter, Beverly Hills Bitch Barbie.” –NoAmbition

3. “You remember that guy from Top Chef: Just Deserts who put gold glitter on everything? No? Oh. Well, I’m him.” —Rob W.

2. “Advanced radar-scattering paint makes me immune to speed traps.” –CobaltBlue

1. “I have a small penis.” –22 people submitted a variation on this

Thanks for playing. Tonight I am going out with Jennifer to hear her band play again. Wish me luck.

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One Response to Top Ten List

  1. Tera Sanders says:

    Response #1 made me do a spit take. Now there’s hot cocoa and bits of Fig Newton all over my laptop. Thanks a lot, a**hole.

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